Robert (hydroai) wrote,
Robert
hydroai

Оасушаем аппарат, выпускаем обратно

Have you ever felt outwitted by your own brain? Yesterday I installed iRooster, a program that lets you use your computer as an alarm clock -- it automatically wakes your computer up at a preset time and starts playing music from iTunes. This is very convenient, since it seems that Germans don't believe in radio alarm clocks in hotel rooms, at least not in Hamburg. This was somewhat ok in the other hotels I stayed at several months ago -- they had some weird thing so that you could program the TV as an alarm clock, and it would automatically turn on at the proper time, thus increasing the evilness of the TV twofold.

The Side Design Hotel, which is the hotel I am staying at now, has either decided this feature really isn't necessary -- or at least made it complex enough that even I can't figure out how to perform this operation on the television (and if I can't figure it out...) Presumably getting a hotel rating one star higher than the hotels I stayed at last time means that you will get a better sleep -- because you won't wake up in the morning before your time.

Anyway, since my attempts to shop in Germany in order to find some sort of travel alarm clock (like the sharper image one or something like that) all failed, despite visiting a travel store, a bookstore and a Bose store, I diligently set the alarm on the computer program for 10 AM. I don't really trust the computer to really wake up correctly, since I'm really a luddite at heart, but there's no real reason for me to wake up at 10 AM other than to try and reduce my jet laggedness. And yes, I could have called in for a wakeup call, but that would mean actually speaking and interacting with a person, which I don't think I should have to do (not do I want to do) for something as trivial as setting an alarm.

Since I'm still jet lagged from arriving here on Friday, I woke up several times during the middle of the night -- one of which I realized my error -- I had forgot to unplug my headphones from the computer. Obviously not being able to hear the alarm on the computer speakers (as the computer speakers are muted when the headphones are plugged in) would obviously get in the way of music waking you up in the morning.

So after waking up for the n-th time in the morning, I decide to check my watch. 11:30 AM. Crap. My first though -- why didn't the computer alarm turn on? -- I look at the computer -- it's on. I get up and take a closer look. The application is running and playing music. I look at the headphone jack. The headphones are still plugged in.

So I've had the experience before where you "wake up" inside of a dream, and it gets confusing because you feel more like you are actually awake -- I was thinking about this yesterday evening, and now my mind has conspired against me. How many times did I actually wake up in the middle of the night, and how many of the n-times of waking up were actually just dreams of me waking up? Yarg!

So I went to see a submarine today, thinking it would be a German WWII submarine. Instead it turned out to be a Russian WWII submarine complete with Russian labels all over all of the equipment. Exciting! My Russian classes weren't for nothing! It was pretty neat, since the submarine's electrical power was actually being generated by the original (or what looked like the original) diesel generators that were installed, giving the entire submarine this lively rumble. The sub was also filled with exciting phrases like, "Открыть клапан подачи фреона" -- "To open the valve of the freon supply" (okay, maybe that's not so exciting). Although yes, apparently клапан means lid, flap or valve, and not just the top thingy on the backpack (Julia says it's called "the brain"). From now on I intend to use the word "flap," for that top thingy. Other than that, it was cool and I have photos.

So the Side Design Hotel is this crazy hotel designed by some sort of "famous" interior designer and some other hotel designer guy. Essentially what this means is that everything looks sort of cool and modern, but is filled with "Norman doors". In this specific case, a door handle that's completely round like the kind people usually have in doors inside of their homes (where the inside and outside handles are the same), but this one doesn't turn. Further more, you have to push it to get in. It took me almost two minutes of putting my magnetic card entry key into the thing next to the door and trying to turn the handle and such before I figured out how I was actually supposed to get into my hotel room. Enough said.

The best reason I can think of for them naming the hotel the "Side Design Hotel" is that everything has sharp edges (so you'd better watching out for those sides!) -- well, everything except for the things that are perfectly cylindrical. Oh yeah, and the TV and telephone, which was clearly not designed by any interior designer, since they are both butt-ugly.

The restaurant here is outstandingly tasty -- it's some sort of Euro-asian fusion restaurant with all sorts of things like "Oxtail soup, " and fruit sushi that's made with a thing slice of mango (instead of seaweed), semi-sweet rice, and red bean in the center. It's all very yummy.

Without further ado, the photos introducing you to tasty foods and the Russian submarine. It also gets SIDE-tracked showing you the hotel room.
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